This Is the Modern ‘Hotel California’

Part 1:

^{The Hawthorne Effect – subjects under observation will modify their behavior due to their knowledge of the observation.}

Sitting on that beach, I didn’t know what to do. Or say. Or make any sense in any attempt of an explanation to provide clarity to the puzzled stare of my Nine-year-old daughter’s face questioning as to why in the Hell nearly every young lady was continuously taking pictures of their own barely covered ass?  There we were, in paradise of the Caribbean, and these youthful women were engaging in only two activities – curving their necks down staring at their phones, only stopping to set up the ‘perfect’ setting for a selfie. 

What could I tell my own young girl? I’d love to tell her the world isn’t so self-involved and shallow, but I know in the back of my head that the data ( and most of human history) doesn’t support such arguments.  If I told her that these were just unseasoned girls, and that “they’d grow out of it”, I would know that was not the truth either.  While adult men’s shallowness is well documented, what often flies under the radar is the surface-based commentary of grown women on social media – even the most vocal railing against misogyny and pro women’s equity post “what a babe!”….”hot mama”…”she’s so beautiful!” and comment on the appearance of other women of all ages; particularly on pictures designed to solicit such commentary. 

So…what do I tell her??? I was lacking an explanation.

When this happened, I was 30 some days into a planned sabbatical from social media that would last over 60*.  I was physically in Mexico and thought I’d escaped the thrall of those dopamine-soaked websites while changing my location. But after seeing the digitally programmed behavior of the masses, it was clear: like the Hotel California, you can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave. Human behavior has been so augmented by these sites, their addictive power so strong, that even when outside of their confines all connected humanity are forced to handle their omnipresence.

So why give up social media?

Did I feel like I had a ‘problem’ with it?  No.  I didn’t feel hooked the way many have truly become ( and it’s far worse than I thought.  More on that in a later post).  Even a self-evaluated non addicted status, I couldn’t escape the notion of “this is a waste of time” that always permeated when opening any social media app, I would continually ask myself “is any of this influencing YOUR behavior and YOUR thinking?”

The hard truth to that question….. Undeniably YES.   Knowing that fact about myself, even if not at addicted or pathological levels, it seemed wrong to know that I was allowing the unconscious push to move me and my brain in ways I personally did not determine.  Worse, I was spending my time on it – any of my time, that I’d never get back.

Back to the Hawthorne Effect- was my behavior different because I knew I was under observation?  With the example of the teenage girls on the beach snapping pics of their booty, the answer is a clear “yes”.  But what about us grown adults?  You? Me? Are we altering our behavior because we willingly put ourselves on display for all the digital porch sitters to observe?

Over the next few posts here, we’re going to explore some of the reasons FOR and AGAINST the use of Social Media, and some of the observations from taking some time away.  I look forward to doing it with you.